In the late ’80s, she made headlines for her marriage to a well-established actor, Kevin Kline, who was 16 years her senior and a confirmed bachelor. The two would go on to create a life that defied the usual Hollywood narrative, focusing instead on family and a commitment to staying grounded.

The pair’s paths first crossed in 1982 during a read-through for “The Big Chill.” Although she did not end up in the film, the brief encounter left an impression. Two years later, their lives intersected again at New York’s Public Theater.

At the time, she was fresh off the success of “Gremlins” and rehearsing a Russian play, while he was immersed in his role for Shakespeare’s “Henry V.” Kline, a classically trained actor with two Tony Awards to his name, later reflected on their early encounters with characteristic humor.

“When I first met [her], I remember thinking, ‘She’s too happy to be with me,'” he said, highlighting her spirited personality, which stood in contrast to his more introspective nature. Despite their different temperaments, their shared passion for the arts set the stage for what would become a lifelong partnership.

A Private Wedding and a Lifelong Partnership

By March 1989, the bond they had nurtured over several years culminated in an intimate wedding ceremony held in New York City. At just 25 years old, the actress married Kline, who was 41 at the time and already a renowned figure in theater and film.

The low-key celebration reflected the couple’s preference for privacy, inviting only close family and friends to witness the union. Shortly after their marriage, the couple began planning a family, welcoming their son, Owen, in 1991, and their daughter, Greta, in 1994.

Reflecting on their early days as a married couple, Kline emphasized the importance of their commitment to family, stating, “We’re both sensible, and we don’t separate for long periods of time. We take care of the marriage.” This decision is what set the stage for their family-centered existence.

At the peak of her acting career, she made a choice that surprised both fans and industry insiders—she stepped away from the spotlight entirely. After welcoming her two children, she decided to prioritize her role as a mother over her Hollywood ambitions.

Her husband has often spoken with admiration about her decision, noting that it wasn’t driven by necessity but by her genuine dedication to their family. “That was one of the many things I loved about her,” he shared. “She loved acting while she was doing it, but she was not driven by it, as I had been.”

Rather than juggle a demanding career alongside family life, she chose to step back entirely, ensuring her children grew up in a stable and nurturing environment. She managed the household without outside help, apart from occasional assistance with cleaning, and made it a point to cook dinner for the family every night.

Raising Remarkable Children in an Artistic Household

The decision to prioritize family created a stable and nurturing environment for Owen and Greta, who grew up surrounded by creativity and support. Both followed their passions in the arts, reflecting their upbringing in an intellectually and artistically rich household.

Despite the accolades, Owen chose to shift his focus to directing, later releasing his debut feature film, “Funny Pages,” in 2022. Reflecting on his parents’ influence, Owen described their steadfast encouragement during his creative journey. “They wanted so badly for me to figure out a way to make my film,” he said.

Greta channeled her artistic talents into music. Performing under the name Frankie Cosmos, she became a celebrated figure in the indie music scene, known for her introspective lyrics and minimalist sound.

For over three decades, Phoebe Cates and Kline have maintained a life focused on family and grounded in simplicity. Now in their 35th year of marriage, the couple continues to prioritize their relationship and their children over the glitz of Hollywood.

“If your marriage lasts more than six months, you’re already in the Guinness Book of World Records, if you’re a Hollywood marriage,” Kline joked during a 2024 interview. He went on to say that he doesn’t consider their relationship a “Hollywood marriage” in either a literal or figurative sense.

He also explained that they’ve deliberately lived outside Hollywood and maintained a low-profile lifestyle. They have lived on Manhattan’s Upper East Side for most of their marriage, choosing a quieter existence far removed from the industry’s traditional hotspots.

Beyond family life, Cates found fulfillment in a new creative venture. In 2005, she opened Blue Tree, a boutique shop in Manhattan’s Carnegie Hill neighborhood. Cates described her vision for the store as “a general store but according to me,” curating an eclectic mix of women’s clothing, jewelry, home goods, and unique gifts.

Their enduring relationship and thoughtful choices have allowed them to build a life centered on their shared values rather than the pressures of fame.