You probably already have your checklist of what you’re most looking for in someone, and you likely have a good idea of what red flags would scare you off or give you what the kids these days call ‘the ick’.

There’s plenty of advice out there for what not to look out for when trying to decide if the person sitting across the table from you is ‘the one’ or a number to be blocked.

However, while you might know what you personally want to be seeing in a new partner there are also traits which a relationship expert has said you really should keep your eyes peeled for.

He said that there were actually about ‘a million’ good things to be on the lookout for, but whittled it down to the core message of just three.

He said: “You want to have a partner who is aware of their wellbeing and is focused on their wellbeing… are they focused on their wellbeing? That’s one.

“Two, values are important but you know what’s equally if not more? How open minded are they? How much do they lean in, how curious are they?

“A third is how resilient are they? Having a relationship with anyone means tough times. Are they able to bounce back, or when things get tough do they just lay on their back?

“If you have a partner who is resilient, a partner who is open minded, you’ve a partner who is focused and nurturing their wellbeing you have a great partner.”

During the conversation, he also spoke about whether shared values were the most important thing for your possible other half, but suggested they weren’t quite at the top of the tree for an important reason.

Brunson said that the idea that values were the most important thing in a partner came from a part of the Bible that said partners should be ‘equally yoked’.

The big thing is to find a partner who is focused on their wellbeing. Everyone knows wellbeing is represented by people jumping together. (Getty Stock Photo)

He claimed that pastors interpreted this to mean someone who was like you in various ways including values, and that it percolated through the centuries so that it still affects our attitudes today, so that when a person is looking for a relationship, they’d want someone who had their values.

“Our values change, they’re not constant,” the relationship expert said, arguing that when on the lookout for your ideal person, the emphasis shouldn’t be put on someone having the same values as you.

Instead of values, which he said were important but not the most important thing, the relationship expert said that the three green flags listed above were the things you should be looking out for.